Finally Mine Read online

  “You deserve better than the back of this pickup truck,” Vin growls as I wrap my arms around his neck and tumble back, pulling him down on top of me.

  I can feel the ridged bumps in the metal truck bed on my back, even through the thick pallet of blankets he lined the bed with. But, uncomfortable as I am, when I look up I see Vin, his green eyes hungry on my face, his perfect mouth turned down in that frown I hate. I reach up and press my thumb on his bottom lip. He smiles around my finger.

  “I like the back of the pickup truck,” I say, and it isn’t a lie. It’s cozy, like a nest. We’re far enough away from the lodge that no one will notice us, and close enough to the babbling stream that runs around the property to drown out any noise we might make.

  I’m thinking about that because tonight’s our last night together, and I want to make a lot of noise with Vin.

  “What are you thinking?” he asks, smoothing my hair back from my forehead. I giggle and shake my head. He rolls to his side, pins my hands over my head and nuzzles my neck. “Tell me.” His whisper brings goose bumps up and down my spine.

  “It’s bad,” I warn.

  He chuckles and sucks just hard enough to get me flustered without leaving a mark. He’s always very protective of me, even in all the small ways.

  “Your worst thoughts are angelic compared to my best ones. You remember I’m here because my lawyer saved me from hard time by the skin of my teeth?”

  “But that was just for drag racing right?” I ask, shrugging my shoulders.

  I know he thinks I’m this good, innocent girl, but I’d love to surprise him on the track sometime. If he only knew how damn fast his “good” girlfriend can go when she gets behind the wheel. My mom and I had some wild times with her father’s friends, pushing the motors of fast, shiny cars with roaring engines to their limits, speeding so fast down those deserted strips, it felt just like flying. That’s a part of me that’s been dormant for a while now and a part my father can’t really stand, but I’d love to experience it with Vin someday.

  I wasn’t sure I’d ever feel a thrill like I did when I was racing again after my mother died, but now, here with Vin, I feel that same rush. That same desire to live life as raw and boldly as possible.

  He shifts his eyes down, nods, and kisses along my collar bones, his strong lips barely brushing my skin. My eyes focus straight up, and I can see the swirl of stars overhead and the big silver moon. When I was a little girl, I used to wish on the moon. I close my eyes now and wish for Vin.

  Just Vin.

  “Something wrong?” He lets go of my arms and pulls me tight to him. I snuggle against his solid body.

  Vin has muscles on top of muscles. It made every guy here hate him on sight when he walked through the gate. They all get their athletic builds from snowboarding and surfing trips, rock climbing and hiking, lacrosse and soccer games. They’re lean, pretty rich boys who all sneered that Vin clearly got his muscles ‘lifting weights in the big house.’

  I run my hands over the ridges and bumps that represent Vin’s strength. Before this summer ‘big and muscled’ was the opposite of my type. So was brash and moody and swaggering. Any one of those traits was pretty much a reason for me to turn on my heel and run.

  But Vin is all of those things plus a thousand others that make my heart skip a beat every time I’m around him.

  For instance, Vin is the most caring guy I’ve ever met. He was a favorite on July fourth at the pony tent the resort set up for the regulars. Every little kid was bouncing for a chance to chat with him and get lifted onto the pony in his arms. I’ve never seen a guy so gentle around kids before. And quiet. Like he was really listening to their earnest little stories.

  He’s also incredibly smart. Even though his body would do a more than adequate job of keeping me entertained, we spend stolen hours in each other’s arms every chance we get, talking about everything and nothing. There’s not a single topic Vin doesn’t have an opinion about, and we’ve laughed and argued over everything from television shows to politics to general lodge gossip. Just when I think I have him all figured out, he says something that shocks me in the very best way.

  “Nothing’s wrong,” I assure him, curling closer. “Except I miss you already.”

  He kisses my forehead. “Don’t think that way, Keira. We’ll talk every night. Text whenever you want. And I promise I’ll drive to visit you as many weekend days a month as I can get off work.” His hands roam, warm and huge, over my curves and his arms wrap around me, surrounding me and making me feel protected.

  “I’ve never felt this way about anyone before,” I confess, rubbing my smooth legs against his, the fabric of his jeans rough on my skin. “I mean, I’ve dated. I’ve had boyfriends. But I’ve never felt so completely wrapped up in another person. It scares me.”

  “Don’t be scared.” He cups my face in his hands and works his thumbs over my cheekbones. “This is the real thing. That’s why it feels this way. Trust me, I feel it too.”

  I fan my fingers over his eyes, watching as they flutter shut. He has eyelashes that are indecent for a guy, and I smile because I’m jealous of my own boyfriend’s lashes.

  “You’re sure this isn’t just a summer fling?”

  He rolls me underneath him, and I love the feeling of being pinned by his body. I run my hands across his wide shoulders and hold onto him like my life depends on it.

  “This isn’t a summer fling,” he insists, raising his eyebrows.

  “How do you know?” I ask, and he kisses me instead of answering. I slide my hands on either side of his face and tug it away so I can force him to look directly at me, into my eyes. “Vin?”

  “Woman.” I love the low, sexy rumble of his laugh. “You just want to hear me get sappy.”

  “I don’t,” I protest. “Unless sappy is how you feel.” I press my hips up against his. He pulls a long breath in through his teeth.

  “You wanna know how I feel?” He fits our hands together, palm to palm, fingers interlaced, then pulls my hand to his mouth and kisses each one of my knuckles. “I feel like the first second I saw you I knew you were gonna be mine.”

  “When did you first see me?” I’ve heard the story before, but I want to hear it again. I want to watch his pupils expand and turn his green eyes a hungry black.

  “You were next to the pool, wearing that tiny red bathing suit and big sunglasses, like a movie star or a model.” His smile is crooked. “That was my first thought; ‘Damn, they have movie stars working at this place? It’s swankier than I thought.’”

  I roll my eyes. “I was probably sweaty and sticky with sunscreen. My hair was probably a rat’s nest. That was the day a fourth grade birthday party came in and kept practicing the dead man’s float. So many false alarms.”

  “Your face was so serious.” He kisses the side of my mouth and his voice drops low. “I thought, ‘I’m gonna take that girl out. I’m gonna make her smile.’”

  “You didn’t need to take me out for that,” I remind him, and he squeezes my hand tighter. “You asked those little boys for help moving the mats. They felt like such big, important men, and they probably made your job take three times longer.”

  He shrugs one shoulder. “Right. But I was moving the mats to the shed behind the pool. So I got to check you out three times longer than I would have if I didn’t have their help.”

  “You always try to make yourself seem less good, Vin.” I kiss him, long and hard, like I can show him through my lips how much I love him, how completely I need him. “You’re the best person I’ve ever met.”

  “You’re crazy,” he says softly. “But hearing you say that means the world to me, Keira. I hope you know that you make me want to be better. You give me way more credit than I deserve, but I’m tryi
ng. I want to be someone you can be proud of.”

  “I am so proud of you.”

  And then I decide that’s enough talking.

  Vin and I have only a few more hours together, and I want us to be as close as we can. My fingers work down to undo his belt. His shirt is already crumpled behind us—I did away with that a while ago.

  He puts a hand over mine. “Are you sure, Keira? I don’t want you to do anything you’re not ready to do.”

  His green eyes search my face, and I wonder how I’m going to make it day after day without having him right there with me.

  “I’ve never wanted anything more,” I tell him.

  “I could get us a room,” he says, and I can almost see him calculating how to do it, how to make things just right for me.

  How can it be he doesn’t realize things are just right as long as I’m with him?

  “I want you here. Now,” I say with all the confidence I can muster. I flip his belt open and watch his lips part as my hand slides down. He’s hard and my breath catches as my fingers wrap around him. “Do you want me?” I ask, my voice husky.

  “Are you joking?” He wraps his arms around me and starts kissing me like he’ll never stop. His mouth is urgent, his tongue slides against mine in a silky twist that makes me moan against him. “I’ve never wanted anything more, Keira. I’ve never loved anyone the way I love you.”

  He pulls the tiny tank over my head and his big, rough fingers undo the delicate clasps of my bra without a hitch. He flicks open the button and tugs down the zipper of my skirt and then pulls the jean fabric down, off my hips. His fingers catch in the elastic waist of my thong, and he slides it down my legs.

  “You’re a goddess,” he declares, looking me up and down with naked approval.

  I look right back at him.

  His shoulders are broad and strong and his waist tapers down to hard abs. I know for a fact he has those abs because he does a hundred sit-ups every morning. He let me watch his routine on one of our days off, even though he thought it was silly for me to waste my time.

  I sort of wish I’d recorded him. Watching his body work made me seriously consider a job as his personal trainer.

  His jeans are open, hanging low off his hips. I press them down, trying to be sexy, but I’m pretty sure my shaking hands negate any sexiness. I swallow hard when he’s completely naked.

  “Keira?” His voice calls me out of my stupor, and I look into his eyes, so gentle and full of love.

  Vin is sweet and hard, gentle and tough all at once. And it thrills me that he’s mine.

  I know what he’s asking me without actually asking.

  Instead of using words to answer, I use my body. I touch him all over his hot skin. I run my hands over his arms, his shoulders, his back, move my lips everywhere I want to taste and kiss. I make noises of pleasure to let him know what I want touched, and I twist against him for more even though I’m not sure how I can possibly handle it.

  It shocks me how hands that spend their days lifting, tearing, and hauling until they’re nothing but a mass of calluses can touch me so gently, they make goosebumps break out over my skin. But as gentle as he is, Vin is very alpha. He knows what he’s doing, and it sometimes feels like he knows my body better than I do.

  Right now his hand is running up my thigh. I open for him and he presses his fingers where I’m already so wet. I let my eyes close and focus on the way he feels against me. He keeps a perfect rhythm and pressure until I begin to shake, the tightness starting low before it unleashes and pours an explosion of heat through me.

  “Vin!” I gasp, clamping my thighs tight around his hand.

  He kisses my neck and face, then down to my breasts. His mouth is hot and needy. “Keira, beautiful, tell me what you want,” he orders.

  A shiver runs up and down my spine, and I arch against him. “You,” I whisper.

  He looks up, his eyes wild, his mouth a tight line. “Say it again,” he demands, but this time it’s almost like he’s begging. Like it hurts.

  “You,” I say, my voice sure. I pull his face down to mine, down so our lips are locked, and tug on his hips.

  He pulls away and grabs a condom out of the pocket of his jeans, puts it on, and positions himself over me.

  “Keira?” he says, checking one last time.

  He doesn’t need to ask again. I’ve never been this sure of anything before.

  “I want you. I love you. And doing this will make me so happy, Vin. Please.” I lick my lips and swallow hard, nervous even though I know Vin would never do anything to hurt me. I couldn’t be safer than I am in his arms.

  “Anything you want,” he says, kissing me tenderly. “As long as I’m alive and breathing, I’ll get you anything you want, Keira.”

  Our bodies are ready. Vin moves his hips back and slides in slowly. I suck my breath through my teeth and relax, trying to let my body stretch and adjust around him. He waits for me to give a nod before he pulls back out and presses into me again. And again. Very soon the discomfort is completely gone, and all I feel is this aching need for more.

  Which makes no sense, because we’re as close as we can get. At this moment, I feel like we’re not just locked together with our bodies: we’re fused heart to heart, soul to soul. For the first time in my life, I feel complete.

  Vin’s kisses are slow and passionate, and he’s whispering things in my ear that make my blood run hot. Things about how much he loves me, how he never wants this night to end, how he’ll always be there for me.

  In the middle of it all, I feel that perfect tightening followed by an explosion of body-tingling release. I shake hard and Vin grips my hips, going stiff and groaning before he relaxes and lays on top of me, panting.

  I snuggle against him, kissing his salty neck. “That was amazing,” I whisper.

  He backs up and looks at me, his eyes reflecting every ounce of sadness and fear I’m feeling right now. “How the hell am I gonna make it not seeing your beautiful face every day?” he asks, running the back of his hand along my cheek. “What am I gonna do without you?”

  “I’ll always be there for you,” I promise, even though we both know that’s not what he’s saying.

  He kisses me again, and this time I can taste the possession. Like he’s branding me as his.

  “One more year and then we graduate. That means I have one year to get my shit straight so I can be the kind of man you deserve.”

  My heart leaps and races in my chest.

  “I don’t deserve you now,” I whisper, meaning it with every breath I take.

  I know full well Vin has to club girls away all day long. The fact that he wants me feels like the best luck I’ve ever managed to stumble on.

  His mouth twists into a scowl. “Don’t talk crazy. You deserve a hell of a lot better than me. But that’s too bad for you.” His scowl unfolds into a reluctant smile. “I’m addicted now, and I’d have to kill anyone who tried to take you away from me.”

  I let my fingers trail down the body that just gave me such intense pleasure, already eager for more of him.

  “Are you going to be one of those alpha male boyfriends?” I tease.

  “Hell yeah,” he answers, his smile growing into a full grin. He wraps his arms tight around me. “You’re mine, Keira McCabe. Forever. And as long as you want me, that’s not changing.”

  “I love you, Vin,” I say, kissing his neck so he won’t see the tears that slide out of the corners of my eyes.

  “I love you,” he answers, his voice rough.

  There will be more before we say our last goodbyes, but, for now, I just hold the man I love tight, hoping that what we built this summer will be strong enough to withstand whatever life throws our way.

  It’s been four weeks and three days since I held Keira for the last time, and I’m going out of my damn mind.

  I expected this summer to be a detour for me. The road I was on wasn’t one any sane person would have chosen, but I never had much opportunity. And I
had even less ambition.

  Then I met Keira.

  From the minute I saw her—curved in all the right places, long dark hair shiny around her shoulders, face like an angel’s—I knew I wanted her. It wasn’t until she came over to thank me for being nice to the little kids running wild around the pool that I realized there was no possible way I could actually have her.

  I’ve been with my share of smokin’ hot girls. And Keira is a perfect ten and more, no question. But she was different from all the other girls right off the bat.

  She walked up to me at the side of the pool, took off those big sunglasses, and squinted at me with eyes bluer than the sky on a perfect summer day. Her lips curved into this sweet and sexy smile, and I realized she was looking at me like I was a decent person.

  Like I wasn’t a complete screw-up.

  She wasn’t all over me because of some bad-boy fetish or because she wanted to be arm candy for Eastside’s resident badass. For the first time in my life, someone looked at me and saw...me. Not the reputation, not the past I could never seem to escape back home.

  But seeing me stripped of my past wasn’t any more accurate than only seeing my out-of-proportion reputation. She was getting a scrubbed-clean version of Vin Moretti, and what she needed was to know my whole sordid past.

  Because a nice girl like Keira needed to keep her distance from a guy like me.

  So I knew from the start I shouldn’t encourage anything. I knew the only way it could end would be complete disaster.

  But I figured just talking now and then couldn’t hurt.

  Which was my first mistake.

  Because Keira McCabe wasn’t just a pretty face I could flirt with and walk away from. She made me laugh every time we had even the most casual conversation. That sweet mouth could also tell jokes so dirty, they’d make a dock worker blush.

  And the more we talked, the more I realized that my first impressions of her—that she was a nice, beautiful rich girl—didn’t begin to scratch the surface. I came to see how fiercely loyal Keira was if she cared about a person. I realized she had passion to learn, to see the world, to understand things the best way she could.